Ways To Piss Off A Preschooler

21 Ways To Piss Off A Preschooler

If you live with a preschooler than you’ll know that it is very easy to piss them off and unintentionally cause a full-on meltdown. Kids are hilarious, cute and very very easily annoyed. Of course, you can blame their crazy, erratic behavior on tiredness, hunger, frustration, or even just testing the boundaries – but let’s just face it, the thing that’s really turned them into an adorable ball of anger is most likely you and your silly grown-up ways. Here are a few ways you can intentionally tick them off.

Do these at your own risk:

1. Say mean things to them, like, your shoes are on the wrong feet.
2. Walk into a different room without taking them with you. Or even warning them that it was about to happen.
3. Try to teach them how to eat with chop sticks.
4. Feed them food that isn’t yogurt or goldfish crackers.
5. Make them wash their hands. Ever!
6. Suggest it’s time they take a bath. Or suggest they do anything for that matter.
7. If you don’t push them in those giant carts that look like a car and not a single person can steer properly without hitting everything. Then they hop out of them half way through the store and insist on walking.
8. Don’t let them talk to whoever is on the phone, even if it’s a call to the plumber. They MUST talk to them.
9. Put ketchup on the wrong side of the plate.
10. Hug any of your other children.
11. Give them a drink in the wrong colored cup.
12. Ask if they might be tired and need a nap.
13. Throw out a rock that was their best treasure ever.
14. Put peas on their plate.
15. Attempt to do the dishes.
16. Wash their hair. Forget “no more tears” and give me the bottle that says “no more tantrums”.
17. Stop at a red light. They will wake up from the deepest sleep to express their disgust for this kind of behavior.
18. Not allowing them to eat cake for breakfast. How dare you!
19. Change their plans or agenda. Who cares if there is a tornado coming. You will still have to go to the park or else.
20. Insist they stop dancing and go use the restroom.
21. Not let them wear red lipstick to school.

So just remember, the next time you’re having one of THOSE days and your kids are driving you up the wall, just remember that the feeling is probably totally mutual. How do you tick your kids off?